


Squall

by oru



Category: Bangtan Boys
Genre: Actor Kim Taehyung | V, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Angst, Coming Out, Idol Jeon Jungkook, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s), Secret Relationship, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2019-02-17
Packaged: 2019-09-25 07:21:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17116949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oru/pseuds/oru
Summary: Hard times arouse an instinctive desire for authenticity.- Gabrielle Bonhuer ChanelIdol Jeon Jeongguk's career comes to a standstill when his intimate pictures with actor Kim Taehyung are leaked and he is exposed to the world for who he is. What he shall make of it is entirely upto him.





	1. Chapter 1

_I am terribly saddened that I couldn't share a very important part of my identity and my life with the people I care about the most-my fans,on my own. This invasion of privacy has lead to the end of much in my career including my contract with the company I've been with for years. I can only wish for my fans to support me through and despite this and forgive me for keeping a part of myself from them. Henceforth I shall try to be as honest as I can with you all._

_With lots of love and regards,  
Jeon Jeongguk_

 

Jeongguk sits on the chair in his apartment, looking over at the computer screen as Namjoon omits and re-types the words, jotting it down to the final passage.

His friend turns to him to give him a once over looking for any hint of deterrence on his features and upon finding none, sends a head shake in his direction as if asking him a question that Jeongguk very well seems to comprehend and gives a nod his way, imitating the older's earlier action.

The almost telepathic conversation seems to be an understanding of the release of the statement to public.

 

Namjoon furiously types away at the computer, as if it physically pains him to convey each term as he shares it on the big bad web.

Now, we wait.

 

 

It's around six pm when he wakes up, his phone still hasn't stopped ringing. 

He lays himself on his couch comfortably, looking at the phone moving in vibration on the coffee table as another call chimes in.

Next to the device, is set a bowl of ramen noodles, stale and cold Namjoon had prepared for him when he was here this noon. He lifts the utensil and goes over to the kitchen, downing the contents into the bin and dropping it onto the sink, appetite long lost.

 

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Idol Jeon Jeongguk's public statement since the release of secret vacation photos with older actor**

**[+4822, -229] I thought Jeongguk was normal. He doesn't look gay. Taehyung on the other hand,it was only a matter of time.**

**[+3714, -171] Celebrities nowadays are accepting whatever trends are coming from the west.**

**[+3280, -119] This is honestly so shameful. I expected better from the golden boy.**

**[+2944, -73] Being gay is so common in this industry but we don't need to see it? It made me so uncomfortable when I saw the pictures of these two men together. Like it is unnatural-go do it in the privacy of your homes. Not in front of our eyes. Disgusting!**

**[+1789, -44] Is he seriously gay? And with that old hag too? This guy is seriously putting it all on stake for that second hand thing? Yuck! Stupid!**

**[+490, -298] We don't care who you love, we're always here for you, Jeongguk <3 **

 

His eyes flicker to the last comment over and over again as if it works as a capsule to give his weak heart some strength to carry on amidst the chaos.

Namjoon had advised him to not open the comments section on the article and he had lied and agreed not to.

Once his friend left, after mulling over it, he tapped onto his phone screen opening a new tab and clicking to view the words netizens had left about him.

 

The day had started as any other. He had woken up early after a considerably satisfactory nap, gone for a jog, made himself some juice.

It was only about ten in the morning, what he assumes must be around when the news broke out, when he started getting the calls.

The first was from his agent, Ha-yoon, which he missed while he was busy in the shower but upon an onslaught of 'are you okay?' , 'hope you're fine' texts, he requites her call immediately.

 

Apparently she, much like the general public couldn't decide what was a more scarring blow to his image-his homosexuality or his association with the actor.

Taehyung, with his string of controversy involvements of a failed marriage to Korea's sweet heart Kim Jisoo and a very public spat with leading actor Park Seojoon among various others and twelve year long failing acting career, wasn't exactly the shining example of an upstanding man of the community.

 

In a matter of minutes, he loses all he has worked for. 

He isn't even called to the agency, just told there is no way to bounce back from this so they had decided to terminate his contract.

He recollects all those years he had given behind the company, the youth that will never return with a single glitch and agreeing to hecatomb him because there is no yield here, only loss.

 

It had been two years since he had debuted under a small company. However, his catapult to international fame from that of his nature of humble beginnings was what caught the fancy of all.

He had successfully garnered a strong fan base outside of his own country; the latest 'it' boy of Korea since he won an award overseas.

 

 

He tries to picture his father hearing it from a neighbour or his mother finding out about her son's unbearable disclosure from one of her friends at the book club and his heart flutters at the sight of seeing them hurt, confused, embarrassed-because of him.

 

He types in the digits onto his phone, his sister picking up on the third ring, speaking in a hushed voice, " Guk-ah, don't call Mum and Dad now, okay? But always remember they love you? Yeah? I love you, baby. "

 

 

_" Increase the volume a little. " His mother calls over from the kitchen as she stands at the aisle chopping vegetables for the soup she's preparing for dinner._

_His father picks the remote up from the centre table, adjusting the sound with the buttons._

_He is lying on his stomach on the living room carpet, colouring an elephant with crayons as his dog lolls on his back._

_He must have been about seven but he remembers every detail, still. The headline on the screen, being read in a voice-over still resonates with him to this day._

 

**38yr old actor Gong Ji-hoon caught red handed with his mystery male lover**

 

_" Repulsive. " His father terms it as, with a scrunched nose as if he had an unsavoury dish._

_" These entertainers- all sinful people. I had so much respect for him. And to think he is. ", his mother adds, without finishing her sentence._

 

He had later read in a few articles that still existed about him on the internet that he was shredded to pieces by the people.

His own fans had turned against him; all his contracts concluded, his civilian honour revoked. 

Directors had stopped approaching him, producers refused to invest in his projects, long time friends he had helped in the past had turned their backs against him.

A year on, the actor had stopped appearing in movies altogether and moved someplace in Europe.

 

He hasn't shed tears, hasn't had that terrible urge yet. Having your life exposed to the public like that can do a number on you.

He seems eerily calm for someone whose prospective career had just come to an end. 

 

Ha-yoon was the only person he had been taking the calls of, pressing the red blob on his screen for all others. He shoots a simple text to his closest friends saying he is alright.

Ignoring his agent's incessant begs to cut all ties, he pulls out his phone and types out.

_To: Taehyung_

_Are you alright?_

 

 

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	2. Chapter 2

" Cut! "

The director bellows out. His co-actor heaves a sigh of vanished pressure and the technicians all disperse onto the sets to take another shot.

He stands there awkwardly despite the cessation of the scene and looks for his assistant in the slight crowd gathered behind the camera guy.

Upon spotting his assistant, he smiles sparingly at his colleague and leaves for his vanity van to get his make up off.

 

Jimin follows him and shoves a bunch of tissues his way so he can wipe his sweat.

When he takes to get a pad of cotton and asks for a toning gel, his assistant informs him that he isn't done for the day. 

" Don't get your make up off yet, Taehyung. ", the older says, the exigency vivid in his tone.

Upon receiving a catechising look from the actor, Jimin says, " You have an on-set interview. One with the entire cast and the other with Seolhyun. "

" Any solos? "

" No. " 

 

The actor had a two am call time today so he had been working for the last eight hours, with no breaks so his mood had been slightly volatile.

 

There's a cursory knock at his door and Jimin reaches for the knob. Jihoon, the director's assistant pops his head inside, looking apologetic, as though he was the bearer of some terrible news.

" Mr. Kim, the director would like to know if you could move according to our new schedules for six am calls. "

" I thought I had to talked to him already regarding that. ", Jimin intervenes looking pointedly at the young boy.

He lets out a nervous laugh. " Yes, Sir just wanted me to confirm it. "

He politely bows to them, only half of his form visible to the two inside and leaves for set.

 

Taehyung huffs unamused taking in his reflection in the mirror. " People are sending their minions to talk to me, now. "

 

There's another brief knock a while later when Taehyung proceeds to leave the vanity for his impending interviews.

There are some incessant taps that follow exhibiting an urgency of a kind.

When his manager Sejin enters the space, his face reflects nothing short of trepidation when he opens his mouth, " There's a terrible news. Your have pictures with Jeongguk have leaked. "

 

Taehyung does not remember much other than being composed amongst the tidings and being escorted out to his car by his manager while Jimin cancels the interviews.

 

_" Faggot! "_

_The profanity earns the utterer a sharp smack on the right cheek from his mother._

_" That is no way to talk to your brother, Hyunjin. Apologise right now. " , his mother rebukes the older of the two._

_Taehyung watches with red rimmed eyes filled with horror since his sibling mouthed the word at him, sweat dripping over his face._

_" But Mum, I saw him kissing a boy from my grade. I saw it with my own eyes. "_

_His mother later corners him after his brother has gone up to sleep and fixes him with a stern look._

_" If what Hyunjin said occurs again that slap is going to land on your face. "_

 

Jimin rouses him up to the smell of pancakes, serves him a couple of a plate with a side of blueberries.

" You haven't eaten all day, Tae. "

 

He forks at the dough absent mindedly when Jimin rises up from his seat at the table to take a call. Taehyung grows slightly curious with the amount of hums he hears the older resound.

 

He turns to him, dropping the phone on the counter, saying, " Jeongguk released a statement. "

 

**[+1789, -44] Is he seriously gay? And with that old hag too? This guy is seriously putting it all on stake for that second hand thing? Yuck! Stupid!**

**~ This is really concerning. Jeongguk is never one to be involved in such controversies but the same cannot be said about Taehyung.**

**~ Something is fishy. Y'all think Taehyung's overactive PR machinery had something to do with it?**

**~ That's not entirely impossible. The guy hasn't had a hit since 1998, I'm sure he needs some or the other way to remain relevant.**

**~ I had that feeling, too. Maybe it's just Taehyung who morphed the photos or tricked him into kissing him. He's honestly disgusting.**

**~ Yeah. I'll still never get over the fact that Jisoo cried for this fag during her award acceptance speech at KAG.**

**~ Yeah never forgiving him for that.**

**~ He's so old too. Yuck. Always thought Jeongguk had a thing for Yeri, guess I was wrong.**

**~ I know he has nothing better to do but at least could've thought about Jeongguk. He's on the brink of success. Selfish whore!**

**~ Hope he dies.**

 

 

_" You know I'm too old for you, right? "_

_Taehyung lays spread on the bed, light filling in the room. Jeongguk's head is set on his bare chest and his fingers make circles over his abdomen._

_He can feel Jeongguk wavering with grin._

_" Hyung, you are not even two full years older than I am. What are you talking about? "_

_" I meant in terms of experience. ", the older licks his mouth, biting at his bottom lips._

_" Oh, I'll show you experience. " Jeongguk lifts himself off, and as if with a challenge in his eyes, grasps his lithe waist, dipping his tongue into his navel._

 

 

" Tae, what are you doing? Don't read those. These fan forums are a breeding ground for disease. "

Jimin takes the computer from his lap as he sets himself on the floor, setting it closed on the coffee table.

" You want a drink? "

" Have I ever said no to a drink? "

 

_He has his hands placed on the slat of the bed, gyrating as Jeongguk rams into him._

_The younger holds a tight grip around his waist, splaying his palms all over the damp back while leaning down to place a peck on the small of his back._

_He shivers, elbows propped on the mattress, head hiding against the headboard as his thighs are bespattered with cum._

 

 

As he is nursing his third glass of whiskey, his phone lights up with the entering of a text.

 

_From: Seojoon_

_Tae, are you okay?_

 

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	3. Chapter 3

__

_He traces his fingers on the sun-kissed skin, thorax heaving up and down, as he kneads the moisture-laden flesh._

_He hauls Taehyung on top of him, lugging his thighs on either sides of his pelvis. Nipping at a bud eliciting sinful moans out of the older's mouth._

_" Fuck, Gukkie. Not just yet. I'm sore. "_

_He sees Taehyung stir off the bed, with partly shut eyes. His bare form exquisite, curves jutting out in classic faultlessness._

_He rustles for some time on the mattress, tugging at the fabric to loll off to the bathroom._

_Some red dye fixated stiffly on the side of the wall he had engendered while washing the shampoo from his lover's soft hair and then, frantically tried effacing._

_He walks to the open kitchen area where Taehyung seems to be busy looking at his phone screen, reading off instructions to cook some eggs._

_He walks over to where he is standing and wraps an arm around his lissom frame, mouthing at the sensitive spot behind his ear._

_"Are you making me breakfast, baby? "_

_" It's three, Guk. ", Taehyung says, slapping his hand away from where he tries to grab at the food the older is plating. " Can you ask Joon where he got these glasses from? I've been looking all over for them. "_

_Jeongguk hums in affirmation, dropping a kiss on his shoulder and moving over to sit on the stool._

 

 

" Guk, are you sure you don't want me to  
come over? ", Yoongi's voice sounds on the other side of the phone.

" I'm positive. " Jeongguk can imagine how desperately his friend want to meet him considering how protective he is of the younger. " Hyung, have you heard from him yet? " He is riposted a curt no.

 

Jeongguk hasn't left his apartment since news broke out, been holed up on the floor, having been advised not to make a public appearance until it all clears up. 

 

He had had his food delivered by his chauffeur, fettuccine from that same place near Namjoon's abandoned apartment that Taehyung used to love so much. He only finishes half of it, the rest of it stored in the fridge.

 

_From: Noona_

__

__

_Baby? Please pick up. I'm worried._

 

This is the fourth message she's sent this afternoon; out of the plethora of texts others have sent him.

 

He snubs the notifications, tapping on his gallery, opening a file from the videos and commences it.

 

The booming of Taehyung's laughter sieves through his speakers, wadding the living room as the pretty star appears on screen, biffing Jeongguk on the nose for tickling his sides.

 

_Taehyung lays splayed on the satin sheets, sunbeam filtering through the opening on the wall._

_He lets out a low moan when Jeongguk presses soft kisses on the inside of his thighs, licking them gently as he makes his way into his warmth._

_" Ngh, Guk. Fuck, stop teasing. "_

_With a lust in his eyes and determined motions, he starts thrusting into Taehyung, coveted._

_He swallows every sound that leaves his mouth in swift motions, paying no heed to the device that lays buzzing on the bedside._

_From: Ha-yoon_

_Where are you?_

_They rest, knackered, sheathed in a coat of warm moisture and cum splatter._

_Jeongguk brings back a damp washcloth and swabs at the older's hole messy with spurt of hot cum oozing out that go all the way down his meaty thighs._

_He climbs the bed and makes way to lay his head beside him, using his finger to draw constellations on the expanse of his unclad chest._

_His gentle touches spread all over his body, making way to his hips as he drapes his leg around it. Taehyung turns to him and with eyes clouded with lust and lassitude, he drops a peck on his cheekbone._

_When they wake up, it's dark already and three hours have passed wasted on sleep. Jeongguk slips out of the bed, makes way to the bathroom and upon return, finds the older propped on his elbow, scantily clad in the sheets._

_He smiles at him, full of torpor. It pulls at his heart, lugs it out his body and irrevocably crushes the brittle thing into a thousand lasting pieces._

_Does this boy know much I love him, he poses. Does he care?_

_He mounts the mattress with conviction as Taehyung laughs at him. The first tickle goes down without a fight, the older continually laughing into the crook of his neck._

_He holds his shoulder in a grip and whines a 'no'._

_" Hmph. Please don't. Gukkie, ah. "_

_But the tickles don't cease. The tip of his fingers spew reds on his sensitive complexion, dipping marks on the sides. With a wrap around his wrists, Jeongguk, he collects his phone with the other hand, disregarding the sea of vexed messages that notify themselves._

_The red button is pressed and the onset of recording is indicated by a noisy snip, as Taehyung's voice rings in the air._

 

 

In the instant, he plays with the heated pasta long run crisp and bland, bifurcating the long, flattened strands of dough.

Gathering his phone from the stand, he taps on a name, writes down his query and sends it across.

 

_To: Jimin_

__

__

_How is he doing?_

 

 

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	4. Chapter 4

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Actors Park Seojoon and Kim Taehyung caught in a public spat**

**1 year ago**

**[+3111, -235] Kim Taehyung, the king of scandals, leave Seojoon alone.**

**[+2087, -198] We all know who was in the wrong.**

**[+2013, -94] This guy can't hold his liquor, ended marriage with Jisoo, broke her heart, pretty believable he was the one who started this fight. Must be so embarrassing for his fans.**

**[+1782, -455] Can you people please leave Tae alone? He's been through a lot already. Fuck all of you trying to make him out to be the bad person when you haven't a clue about the situation.**

**[+1490, -206] Let's be real we all know who could at fault out of park seojoon and Kim Taehyung lol**

 

Every push in fervid, every thrust propels Taehyung into a dizzying shape; makes him jolt with pleasure. A final shove inside him drives him into release; like a dart hitting the right spot.

 

They fall into disarray, a clutter of sweat and loud, uneven breaths.

 

" Fuck. Fuck, God knows I needed that. "

 

_" Taehyung? Taehyung! Open the fucking door. "_

_There's a pound on the wood, a thump so solid he's sure the door will be unbolted fully in no time._

_He cannot meet the wrath; he is jittery all over with fright. Knows this will only make his chances of getting condoned poorer._

_" I swear I'll fucking rip you to shreds if you don't open the door right now. "_

_Another shiver and an onslaught of curses follow._

 

He opens the message alert, gawks at the words strung together.

 

" How long have you been awake, Tae? "

 

He closes the screen. Tries not to brood on it. 

Takes a place inside the sheets again, hiking a leg up a thigh and an arm on a waist.

 

_" I'm not doing this. "_

_" This is not a request, Taehyung. No one asked for your say in it. Nobody wants it. We're telling you. "_

_The two men in well fitted suits hover above him; anticipate his next action. He looks over their shoulders and is given a brief nod and a shake of the head._

_He jots a trail of blue ink in the cursive of his name on the dotted line._

 

" I can't stay over. "

 

Impacting a dip in the mattress, the figure retreats off the bed. The unclosed door gives way to little sounds; a surge from the tap and a flush.

 

" Will you be okay? "

 

Taehyung's face paints the image of a tight lipped smile over his features, an entire contradiction to his verite.

 

" Yeah, I'll be fine. "

 

_Seated at the couch in the waiting area outside the director's office, Taehyung goes over the incidents of last night and how he could've avoided it had he been a little more in control of his emotions._

_He doesn't know how the media got a whiff of it, doesn't know what other material they have of it._

_So far, there had only been pictures. He would be doomed if there was more._

 

He sits alone in the apartment, that is usually how most days go. 

Jimin stays over on nights that get too lonely, when he thinks a good lay or a good conversation does not do enough for intimacy.

When all he wants is a reassurance- of any kind, big or small. A hand that drapes over his and a trust deposited so deep in the chest that it can't be robbed so easy.

He lifts himself up on elbows, plugs his phone to charge at the bedside, traces his thumb on the screen lingering over that one unread message.

 

_" Ah, that fucking hurts. "_

_Taehyung chuckles at his agony. " Sit still. ", he says with another tug._

_Jeongguk yields to him, always does. No matter how outrageous a thing he asks of him. He doesn't think too much of it. Cannot afford to let his thoughts amiss._

_He brings his phone, camera open near the younger's face and shows him his likeness; hair pulled up high in two small space buns._

_" I fucking look like Pucca. "_

_" You look cute. ", Taehyung upholds his hairstyling skills._

_Jeongguk hates it when he calls him that._

_A strong palm sets itself on Taehyung's thigh and he gives out a squeal, following by a fit of muffled giggles at the small pinches make way from his belly to his buds._

_When the fingers reach the surface of his armpit and make the first prod, he concedes._

_" I'm sorry. I'm sorry. " ,with eyes devoid of any sentiment of the utterance. " Come fuck me Pucca Daddy. "_

_Jeongguk guffaws, " You're ridiculous. "_

_From: Jimin_

_Do you want me to come over? Has Seojoon left?_

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	5. Chapter 5

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Idol Jeon Jeongguk spotted kissing actor Kim Taehyung on holiday**

**[+6701,-102] What the hell is up with 2018?**

**[+5044,-93] That is disgusting. Jeongguk cannot be gay. I'm not believing this shit. Kim Taehyung will do anything for publicity I'm sure he orchestrated all of this.**

**[+3567,-79] I don't even want to say anything. These idols are all liars. I don't understand why fans spend so much resources on them.**

**[+936,-255] This is a serious invasion of privacy. Take the pictures down immediately.**

**[+708,-66] Jeongguk looks disgusted. This is forreal staged.**

**~ Oh my god I know someone who works in Jk's company and he said Jk can't stand Taehyung. This is cheap publicity.**

**~ I'm sure they were drunk. Taehyung is a known alcoholic. Embarrassing.**

**~ Oh yes! Wasn't he in rehab or something?**

 

_Jeongguk sits on the couch, feet set on the cool marble, moans passing his lips almost inaudible between the heavy breaths._

_Taehyung has his lips wrapped around the head, a hand placed on his thighs, the other stroking the base._

_Jeongguk smiles- hands shoved in the tangles of his hair, jerking with every sip._

 

" They can't just pull out at the last moment. "

Jeongguk can sense an awkward pause on Namjoon's end before he cuts the call.

Leaned against the armrest of the settee, feet propped up on the other end, he thinks all he needs in this moment is a hand around his middle, a weight on his chest and the familiar scent of lavender.

 

_He sniffs the crisp and raw smell from where he nips at the base of Taehyung's neck._

_The warmth has him enshrouded entirely, he lets out a grunt at the saccharine essence of the feel._

_" Is this lavender? "_

_Taehyung hums an affirmation, betwixt the flutters, the vibrations wavering through his damp form._

 

Ha-yoon comes over, situated on the large chair clumped in the middle of the drawing space, level floored in Persian rug.

Sitch capped with discomfiture, Jeongguk squirms under her deducing vision.

" You want some coffee? "

 

_" What did Ha-yoon say about this? "_

_Buried in linen, clammy and jaded, Taehyung poses the query._

_The paucity of a solid answer makes him hoist himself up on an elbow, he gives a probing brow lift._

_Jeongguk swathes his tongue along his foot, prods at the hard skin of the sole. Taehyung jolts, murmuring._

_" You haven't told her, have you? "_

 

She stares at him with her guilt laced profile, the level of culpability visible in her eyes. 

He thinks he knows what she is going to say.

 

_" I didn't realise you were friends with Park Seojoon. "_

_One of the infrequent times they are not at Namjoon's, a rare occasion he isn't hovering above Taehyung, with the boy beneath him, squirming._

_Congruent concert, disparate dates._

_Yet somehow they end up together in a compact bathroom stall._

_It's filthy, he thinks. This discreet, secret love affair with the older male. It's dirty how he has his nimble fingers folded around his supple waist._

_The palm of the other hand grabs a cheek, squashed._

_Taehyung whimpers, granting no retort, hands warm and tight on his nape._

_" I thought I read in the papers that. Ngh. "_

_He goes frail in the knees, convulses with an intensity when Taehyung fingers dip inside the fabric of his pants._

_" Don't believe everything you read in the papers, Gukkie. "_

_It doesn't end colossally different though._

 

He pulls up his phone, leans his head onto a pillow. His home bereft of others.

Having procured no answer, the lingering feeling of a honeyed boy running through his mind, he delves into his phone, taps on an icon, directs himself to the last resort.

 

**[Trans] NAVER: Park Seojoon seen leaving Kim Taehyung's apartment**

**[+ 554, -19] Who even are these people? I don't know anymore?**

**~ I know! Weren't they fighting like a hot minute ago.**

**~ Lol I'm confused too**

**[+ 471, -127] Damn this Taehyung guy really gets around, huh?**

**~ What a slut, prancing around town with a new guy every day.**

**~ Please delete this. Don't tarnish Seojoon's reputation. He has nothing to do with this mess.**

**~ Yeah. There aren't even photos. I doubt he was even there.**

**~ Idiots! Seojoon and Taehyung used to be friends before that "fight" maybe get to know your faves better?**

**[+361, -28] This entire thing is a mess I'm out.**

**[+209, -22] What the hell? Are we forgetting this is the guy who broke Jisoo's heart? No sympathy for cheating bastards.**

**~ Why do you have to comment about her on every post? Is that your job?**

 

_To: Noona_

_How are mum and dad?_

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	6. Chapter 6

_Taehyung feels numb, stares at the reflection he doesn't recognise, a face oddly familiar, painted black and blue._

_He doesn't feel the pain he'd felt when the blows landed on his skin._

_Amongst the repugnance and sordid advances, there is a hand that has been in his for long. A hot breath against his ear.  
" Run away. " _

_So, he runs away._

 

Taehyung leers at the fissure in the glass on Jimin's phone, studies the way it is ruptured from what he surmises is the impact on a ground fall.

He wonders if the screen has one of those protective sheaths, that glass layer that is for cushioning it; wonders if concealing the surface really aids in shielding the core.

 

 

_" I think I am in love with you. "_

_One has no dominance, no hegemony over the jumbled thoughts that pass as murmured words when raptured, in the throes of delectation._

_He lets it go. Leans forward to wrap a hand around, chasing release._

 

 

" What do you want to do for dinner? "

Jimin emerges, appears at the sill of the kitchen, body fixed on the separator. 

Picks up his phone from the table, eyes moving to and from the cracked glass, lighting up his face to Taehyung's.

" Whatever. "

He budges to veer back into the kitchen when Taehyung moves his lips, ensues in the older pivoting.

" Jimin, I know I don't tell you this enough but I really love you. "

 

 

_He gets a phone call around the onset of the night, he's slept in a vacant bed, staring at the silver on his digit._

_Unable to discern the number as one he knows, he thumbs at the green. Only a smattering amount have his personal, he trusts his team to have given it to someone he would want to hear from._

_An audibly breathy voice transpires on the other end._

_" Taehyung? It's Hyunjin. Dad's dead. "_

 

 

He is twelve when his brother lands a punch in his gut for kissing a boy from his grade a second time. Several warnings later, he does it again.

 

Several years later, his father gives him a bloodied mouth for liking boys, kissing them, for liking kissing them.

 

He is fifteen when he runs away, darting away from arms that gave him fillip to go.

 

Always him who gets the blunt end, the worst segment. Isn't a well earned win, either.

 

 

_" Are Jisoo and you planning to have kids soon? "_

_She sits beside him, forges a shy smile placing a hand over her mouth, the wine- stained rouge painting a fraudulent natural blush on her cheeks._

_He writhes under the attention, flails his limbs, nullifying any faith he has ever had in himself to act._

_" Soon. "_

_Fixing him with a reticent grin, she answers for the both._

_The audience fall into fervid cheering._

 

 

" Why was Seojoon here? "

 

His mind centres in the present, his eyes land on Jimin's profile, jaw sharp, lips perfect, he could have easily been cropped out of the crowd to be an idol or an actor, like him.

 

He always asked him why he didn't want this life; filled to the brim with opulence. He doesn't ask anymore.

 

" He wanted to talk. Felt bad about the whole spat and then the statement in the paper. "

 

" After an entire year? "

Jimin looks on, suspicious. He always suspects mild dubiousness on everyone's part.

" He was sorry, I guess. ", Taehyung shrugs, wanting to appear non chalant like he doesn't know he wasn't just here for that.

 

" He apologised? "

Jimin narrows his eyes, they flash a hue tentative, doubtful.

 

Taehyung hums. " Something like that. "

 

 

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Park Seojoon releases statement regarding his public spat with actor Kim Taehyung**

**" I have know Taehyung since I began my career in the industry. He is one of the brightest stars that this generation has seen and I have learnt much from him. I wouldn't want to dignify what you people witnessed on video because that is not important, not to me and I'm assuming not to Taehyung-ssi. I refuse to comment further on it. "**

**[ +2800, -45] This is called a dignified man. He truly appreciates his fans and the public.**

**[ +2331, -77] Seojoon is so humble. Even though Taehyung is old news and he is on the top now he still doesn't disrespect his seniors. Love him.**

**[ +1837, -66] Can Taehyung disappear from the face of the earth? It's just plain embarrassing now.**

**~ And to think to went to Cannes to represent our country *faints***

**~ Shut up Seojoon will always be the scum that is along with all of you Taehyung is a king your clapped fave can't relate**

**~ This isn't twitter, missy. Get off**

**[ +1166, -48] Seojoon we are here for you. Fighting!**

 

He did further his comments on it. In an interview, on national television, with all of the bisection of Korea watching.

 

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Actor Park Seojoon calls fight with Kim Taehyung a result of " drunken behaviour"**

**In an interview with Lee Jongin of SNTV, Park Seojoon blamed the public fight with fellow actor Kim Taehyung on the latter being drunk.**

**He said of the former A-List star, " He was under the influence and we often regret and don't endorse things we do and say when we are not sober. I would absolutely take my share of the responsibility for the commotion. "**

**When asked if the two were on talking terms, he added, " No we aren't but Taehyung, if you're listening, I wish you a speedy recovery. Fighting. "**

**[ +3680, -223] Major passive aggressive vibes.**

**[ +2891, -114] Who should we even believe? They're all a bunch of liars**

**~ Can't believe Taehyung calls himself a teetotaller in all his interviews lmfao**

**~ I know right? Remember that variety show he was on where he made that face when he was served vodka?**

**~ Shut up. Maybe he wanted something harder. Like scotch.**

**[ +1777, -66] Speedy recovery from what? Is Taehyung an alcoholic?**

**~ Oh my god maybe that's the reason Jisoo left him**

**~ You might be onto something**

 

" You knew the press is here? "

Taehyung taps on his screen, quashing chunks of matching candy. The remark disrupts his winning streak. 

 

" What press? "

 

Puzzled, he looks away from the blinding set of coordinated shades. 

 

" Figured as much. Was wondering why you'd call him over. " , he almost reprimands. Then, taking a quick look at Taehyung's face, goes on. " Not too many of them, just a bunch. "

 

_" Some cameras followed me to the airport, earlier today. I thought the plan was going to be botched. "_

_Jimin gives him a disapproving look, agitated ever since he told him about Maldives._

_" Be safe, Tae. "_

_From: Jeongguk_

_Have you arrived?_

_Taehyung reaches the resort sometime in the evening, Jeongguk the previous night to avoid conjecture._

 

Jimin struts to the front of the gate, grabs their dinner.

They sit in the dining space, seated on the tall stools at the aisle, cheese dripping out of the thin crust of the doughy pizza.

His phone shines, on the coffee table in the living area.

 

_From: Jeongguk_

_Guess we're done, then?_

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday, Taehyung <3

_" Who's Aela? "_

_Taehyung's form is stowed on the kitchen island, limbs hanging from the counter as the cubes of kiwi ebb from the fruit bowl in his hand._

_Jeongguk strides from where he'd been standing at the stove over to the aisle, hefting the device and moves his finger across the screen to pick it up on the succeeding ring._

_With two digits heaved and the wink of an eye, he answers him, " She's a songwriter for our company. ", retreating to his room while the ramen boils on maximum range._

 

Jeongguk rouses in the midsnt of the night to a phone call from Namjoon. A triad of hours have passed since midnight so he reckons it crucial.

 

The voice at the end of the line sounds limpid unlike the muzzy noises he tiredly throats.

 

" Jeongguk, I've mailed you a link. Please open it right now. "

 

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Despite major controversy, fans in Thailand refuse to cancel event scheduled for a fanmeet with idol Jeon Jeongguk**

 

_Jeongguk sounds a low moan, voice hoarse, face red, hands clammy, one slipping from where it is trying to grasp tight on Taehyung's waist._

_The other stroking his length making to seep into the fissure._

_" I want you to go without. "_

_Taehyung looks like he is unplumbed in pleasure, unable to ruminate, tactless with the way he let his mouth fall open. All he sees is Jeongguk and his own rapture, his own exaltation; and the younger is his mechanism, his very own ecstasy._

_The other boy halts his wandering hands,  
" Are you sure? "_

_There is an explicit fickleness, hesitancy fusing in his voice, a consternation in his eyes._

_A wildness, hysteria of sorts that births a fright in his eyes and he can't look into Tae's. Almost like he knows what is imminent is going to be of no nature other than dispiriting._

_Taehyung is unable to pick up on that, he doesn't recognise the curl that the loops in his thoughts have created in Jeongguk's head. He places a kiss on the boy's jawbone, palm shifting from his torso all the way up to the hair on his nape, and utters, " Yeah. Raw. Want to feel you, Gukkie. "_

_When Jeongguk stops the stroking motions, shifts his weight, there is an audible silence in the air; one that stipulates discomposure._

_Taehyung is pulled out of his drunken haze and with a single look Jeongguk's way, realisation dawns upon him. There is an instant rue in his overtones, a nuance of alarm, at what he had just suggested._

_The older blends it in with a gallop of nonchalance, an expression that says the implication does not affect him in any way but the reddening of his features dissent._

_He stammers out, " We don't have to. I just thought. ", but the dispute is concluded. " Shit. "_

_" Fuck. Fuck. " Jeongguk verbalises, at last. " Please don't be pissed. Are you pissed? "_

_Taehyung moves from beneath his form and rolls over, tapering the distance towards the edge._

_" You are pissed. "_

_Taehyung huffs, boyishly, " No, I'm not. I just don't wanna fuck anymore. "_

_He is staunch in maintaining an expression that guises him, instead airing that he is unaltered by what had just happened between the two or the eventuality of it._

_He adjusts his position on rim of the mattress and withdraws into the bathroom, retreating silhouette idyllic in bare form._

_Later that evening Jeongguk is spread on his bed, chagrined by the events earlier, with his phone in hand, typing out._

_Taehyung had left his apartment abruptly giving no blunt explanation despite which Jeongguk knew what the reason behind the animosity was._

_He had returned to the city a day earlier than planned, from his promotional tour; had cut short his own plans of sightseeing whatever part of the continent he was in, on a day off because Taehyung had told him he was going out of town the next day and would be unable to meet him for weeks._

_When **this** started between them some months ago, Jeongguk had already been falling but he remembers Taehyung was the one to explicitly say they could see other people, that he wasn't exclusively available to him. He wonders what changed, wonders if the boy had grown an attachment to him; to whatever they had._

_And he tries to console himself by telling himself Taehyung never deemed it serious; it was his ego that was hurt but deep down he knows there is more to it than mere self-absorption and ends up with a feeling of scarcely credible guilt._

_To: Taehyung_

_I'm sorry_

__

 

" So, how does a six am flight in the morning sound? That way you can avoid the cameras, too. "

Jeongguk has been sedentary on his sofa since Namjoon came over in the morning. He had taken some coffee the older had made him but refused a bowl of sprout salad.

" Are we even sure anyone's going to turn up? "

Namjoon takes to reaching out for his phone on the table, pulls up a tab and the number of messages are manifold.

" There are petitions, Guk. Your fans are going hard. They have gone bonkers! "

The promise of an event in the country that the fans had demanded be fulfilled was one that was to be held by the company that managed Jeongguk and a sponsor for whom the idol promoted. With neither in concord, the chances still seem slim.

Jeongguk is unconvinced, doubt layering his words as he queries, " How are we going to pull it off? "

 

 

**Jeon Jeongguk Thailand Fanclub**

**Source: Twitter**

**" I have always said we should be the most thankful for the people who love us. It's time for me to thank you all, who have decided to stand my me no matter where the wind takes us with it, no matter what trials or tribulations await us and I am truly grateful to you. I really can say that I have experienced unconditional love. I appreciate you more than you know. I love each and everyone of you. See you soon. "**

**Statement:**

**The venue and the date and time of the event have been altered, the link below has the details.**

**HE IS COMING TO THAILAND!!!!!!!!!**

**~ Yes yes yes we did it!**

**~ So proud of us. Let's show Jeongguk the utmost respect and support.**

**~ I can't believe I'm going to see. I'll give him kisses and tell him how precious he is.**

**~ Can you imagine how monumental this? An acceptance first of it's kind in a country like ours? It gives me so much happiness. Jeongguk, you're so brave. We love you!**

**~ We support you, baby!**

 

 

_Taehyung leaves town for a shoot the following day, leaving his texts unanswered._

_He sends him a slew of them, most apologetic, some not, asking him how he was or where he was and he thinks it must be tiring for the older to see him come up in his notifications, so he stops._

_They don't see each other for what turns out to be a longer wait than one he had anticipated._

 

 

Jeongguk takes to tidying up his apartment, something he only does when he is overstretched like he is, now.

Anxious hands rinsing all trace of every grime and muck in the seemingly faultless furnishings.

He grabs some clothes from his closet and piles them up in a neat order in a large suitcase and a valise, precision immaculate. 

He goes to bed early but lies awake, his phone on the bedside, awaiting a call, a text, anything, that he knows is not coming cheap, until his eyes shut and he drifts off.

 

_From: Yoongi_

_All the best, Guk!_

 

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The regular updates might scant with time.
> 
>  
> 
> I hope all of you are enjoying this work. Thanks for the support :)


	8. Chapter 8

_" Taehyung, you can't be seen out with anyone that's not your wife. Let alone a gay bar. "_

_His manager is forbearing in his approach, mismatching the fervid feedback his company conveyed._

_Taehyung is obdurate in the way he is seated as he grunts. " She's not my wife. "_

_" Well, to the public she is. Don't be deliberately unhelpful, Taehyung. It isn't my career at stake here. You're lucky no big publication got whiff of it. "_

 

 

" Have they left? "

He is arrayed in an armchair, large. Bogum had given him the name of store, he thinks.

Jimin sneaks through the casement, struts in as a small grin reappears on his lips as the lines on his forehead remit.

He sees his friend's phone has been restored, glass exchanged for another, no hint of damage, as good as new. 

Covetousness has never looked more pathetic. 

 

_The drawn out months of nullity cease when they meet at an awards night._

_Actors seldom visit these events for the music industry, he was invited to present a prize to a fresh new face._

_It causes his memory to remember something not from too far in the past._

_A day that had ended much like this night._

 

 

" My phone hasn't buzzed this many times in years, Tae. Elle wants to do an interview with you. "

Jimin sounds elevated, optimistic even. A final escape from the failed career of a mundane has been movie star, the media finally displaying some engrossment. A hint of titillation, a peculiar interest in him. 

He is more pragmatic than his friend, has to be. He sees no way out than backwards.

It isn't about the artist anymore, nor the person but the chap who beguiled the media's golden goose. 

 

_" It's with a new boy- Jeon something. "_

_Sejin stands still next to Taehyung, a tall glass of some Starbucks beverage in his hand. A fit of bitter sounding titters escape his lips. " So, they've got new no-name boys partnered with me for photo shoots now, huh? "_

_" He's doing massively well overseas. He's making it big. "_

_The sneer doesn't leave Taehyung's features until he mouths the next question. A brief credence in what he reads often slips into his own thoughts of himself; esteem threadbare by copiousness of hogwash. " Why me,then ?"_

_His frontage collapses, he has heard way too long, surrounded himself with mobs of too caring too kind people who shun the demise of a once gloriously revered man far more than the casualty itself._

_" He asked for you. "_

 

**[ Trans ] NAVER: Jeongguk leaves Korea**

**[+367, -23] Running man**

**~ I don't want to laugh but this is funny**

**[ +204,-39 ] He was our pride still can't believe this is true truly disgusted**

**[ +47,-12] namjoon is sticking by like a leech**

**~screams into the distance moolah moolah**

**~ TRUE**

 

He spasms where he sits. 

Jimin lays on the bed, insensate in sleep.

He scrolls through the pages, a nascent titled article popping up with every touch, surface hot against his digits from overuse.

 

**Jeon Jeongguk lands in Bangkok.**

**Source: Dispatch**

**Korean musician Jeon Jeongguk,24 has set foot in Thailand already.**

**He was spotted at Incheon in the wee hours of the morning amidst the chaos and was seen by onlookers in the company of close friend and producer Kim Namjoon instead of his usual battalion of several helpers.**

**The fans wait for him with baited breath.**

**~ Welcome baby!!!**

**~ We love you, you're not alone**

**~ I can't wait to see you, Kookie my love**

****

 

_The clutch on his mid is steely, the proprietorial clinging ample to send him into lunacy._

_He is bent, sweaty palms failing to grapple a hold on the wall._

_The position would be humiliatingly uncomfortable if wasn't so warm, scarlet with passion._

_The glide is swift, the shoves resolute and deepening as the hands clasp tighter._

_" I missed you. "_

 

Jimin looks departed in his doze, full mouth partly opened; slow breathing. 

He looks up drowsily to Taehyung when he fits himself, bodies snug. 

" Min, please hold me. "

 

As he slips into sleep, bones paining in lethargy, he tries not to deliberate too heavily about the last words he typed out.

 

_  
To: Namjoon_

_Wish him luck  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise more rapid updates from now on; and lengthier 
> 
>  
> 
> I hope someone is still reading this


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